The Definitive "Sex With Dead Animals" Thread!

(Q1)  Yes - and I had an orgasm!

3 (4.4%)

(Q1)  Yes - tried it, didn't like it / didn't finish

1 (1.5%)

(Q1)  No - but now that you mention it...

2 (2.9%)

(Q1)  No - never!  But I don't care if others do

6 (8.8%)

(Q1)  No - never!  And people who do should be ostracized

4 (5.9%)

(Q1)  No - never!  And people who do should be in jail

2 (2.9%)

(Q2)  Your penis - full insertion

4 (5.9%)

(Q2)  Your penis / testicles - external contact only

0 (0%)

(Q2)  Your vagina - full insertion

1 (1.5%)

(Q2)  Your vagina - external contact only

0 (0%)

(Q2)  Your anus - full insertion

2 (2.9%)

(Q2)  Your anus - external contact only

1 (1.5%)

(Q2)  Your artificial cavity - full insertion

0 (0%)

(Q2)  Your artificial cavity - external contact only

0 (0%)

(Q3)  Human

1 (1.5%)

(Q3)  Pig

3 (4.4%)

(Q3)  Cow / Bovine

4 (5.9%)

(Q3)  Lamb / Sheep / Goat

1 (1.5%)

(Q3)  Chicken / Other Bird

0 (0%)

(Q3)  Fish

1 (1.5%)

(Q3)  Other commonly eaten animal

2 (2.9%)

(Q3)  An exotic animal

2 (2.9%)

(Q4)  Whole, recently deceased

1 (1.5%)

(Q4)  Whole, been dead 1+ days

0 (0%)

(Q4)  Cut into pieces

1 (1.5%)

(Q4)  Isolated organs

1 (1.5%)

(Q4)  Supermarket grade - whole

1 (1.5%)

(Q4)  Supermarket grade - cut into large pieces

2 (2.9%)

(Q4)  Supermarket grade - steak

4 (5.9%)

(Q4)  Supermarket grade - sausage

2 (2.9%)

(Q4)  Supermarket grade - ground / hamburger

0 (0%)

(Q4)  Vomited out by another animal

1 (1.5%)

(Q4)  Liquefied in a blender

1 (1.5%)

(Q5)  It was raw

5 (7.4%)

(Q5)  No comdom / etc

3 (4.4%)

(Q5)  Didn't shower afterwards

2 (2.9%)

(Q5)  Cooked and ate it afterwards

3 (4.4%)

(Q5)  Ate it raw

1 (1.5%)

Total Members Voted: 7

[Alex Libman]

Yes, it does have to be dead, and, yes, it does have to be an animal (teddy bears and veggie burgers don't count).

(Q1) Did you?  (Q2) Which of your "sex ports" were in contact?  (Q3) Species?  (Q4) Presentation?  (Q5) Etc?

If you answer No to Q1, skip the rest.

For example, if you like to tenderize your beef steak by cutting a hole in it and fucking it before throwing it on the grill, check 1, 7, 17, 29, 34, 35, 37.  If you like to stab yourself in the stomach and fuck the hole with a dead squirrel, you might check options 2, 13, 22, 24, 34, 35, and 36.

[BonerJoe]

I fucked a rump roast once.

[Sam Gunn (since nobody got Admiral Naismith)]

Dude you are a fucking freak.

[Alex Libman]

Dude you are a fucking freak.

Oh, take a chill pill.  I am a hard-working heroic fighter for legitimizing ever-greater human degradation, and I will have to work extra hard to top this poll someday.  But I will.  Watch me, Jew boy.  I am your worst nightmare - a decent human being who isn't decent out of naive sheltered ignorance.  I make people like you look like freaks.

Now then, please do post - who fucked what and... how was it?

[Sam Gunn (since nobody got Admiral Naismith)]

Dude you are a fucking freak.

Oh, take a chill pill.  I am a hard-working heroic fighter for legitimizing ever-greater human degradation, and I will have to work extra hard to top this poll someday.  But I will.  Watch me, Jew boy.  I am your worst nightmare - a decent human being who isn't decent out of naive sheltered ignorance.  I make people like you look like freaks.

Now then, please do post - who fucked what and... how was it?

Oh okay.  Call me a Jew boy and tell me I'm a freak when you're the asshole with a Sex with Dead Animals thread.  I didn't get why Shaw gave you shit at first, but the last few weeks, I fucking GET it.  You're almost as bad as NHAT, but at least your coherent, which might make you worse.

[Kevin Freeheart]

Every now and then I'm blown away by Alex Libman's posts. I forget where it was, it was off this forum but he was defending anarcho-capitalism to statists and doing it fairly well. Well enough that I wondered if it weren't really a coincidence that the two accounts had the same handle...

Here's another...

Oh, take a chill pill.  I am a hard-working heroic fighter for legitimizing ever-greater human degradation, and I will have to work extra hard to top this poll someday.  But I will.  Watch me, Jew boy.  I am your worst nightmare - a decent human being who isn't decent out of naive sheltered ignorance.  I make people like you look like freaks.

As to the question, I don't think I've ever had sex with a dead animal.

Unless you wanna get REALLY abstract... One could classify the act of chewing a steak as "S&M oral on a bovine".

[blackie]

This poll needs a "yo mama" option.

[Alex Libman]

You're almost as bad as NHAT, but at least your coherent, which might make you worse.

I will try harder...  (Which isn't my sole purpose on this BBS, of course, but it's one of the dimensions of virtue that I strive to excel at.)

I forget where it was, it was off this forum but he was defending anarcho-capitalism to statists and doing it fairly well.

If you're talking about recently, then it must have been on the JREF forum, from which I was banned soon thereafter.  (Details thread here.)

One could classify the act of chewing a steak as "S&M oral on a bovine".

Q1 uses orgasm to define whether sex is taking place.

This poll needs a "yo mama" option.

Only if the mama in question is neither human, pig, nor cow, etc.

One can always add more gag options to a poll, but I figured "vomited out by another animal" /  "liquefied in a blender" were enough, and they contributed to the aesthetic nature of this particular thread.

[Russell Griswold]

The stink kind of keeps me from trying it.

[Alex Libman]

The possibilities presented by this poll suggest a wide array of odors.

Doesn't a nicely cooked steak smell nice?

[Russell Griswold]

The possibilities presented by this poll suggest a wide array of odors.

Doesn't a nicely cooked steak smell nice?

Yes, indeed it does.

[Kevin Freeheart]

Q1 uses orgasm to define whether sex is taking place.

Ah, in that case then only with the human animal and never dead.

[Alex Libman]

Yes, it does have to be dead, and, yes, it does have to be an animal (teddy bears and veggie burgers don't count)

[dry_ice]

This is fucked up. 

[YixilTesiphon]

The idea is sickening, but I don't see how it's any more wrong than eating a steak.