I believe that people created racism. It is not a natural belief, because in reality we are all human. We are all made of the same materials. Once upon a time, somebody thought up the word nigger, and at some point decided that it would be used as a derogatory slang term for black people. If you put it in perspective, you'll realize that if that one thought had not occurred to that one person in that one moment in time, our culture would not be the way it is today.
We are all made of the same elements, sure. But we're still animals, and still have the same aggressive/passive/dominant/aggressive/survival instincts. These things play themselves out in the form of "racism" at times, though most of us get along well. It's already been mentioned that "niggardly" is the word that "nigger" has been derived from, and it at one time applied to anyone possessing certain qualities that seemed to make them inferior to educated, productive and civilized beings. Back in the old days, a few generations into slavery - and you had some people who couldn't possibly overcome their situation. They were uneducated, uncivilized - and probably were not productive outside of what labor was forced upon them- through no fault of their own. They were treated as animal stock.
If it hadn't been someone thinking up that word and/or applying it to black people of that condition, then it would simply have been a different word.
I also feel that the black culture as a whole is flawed in the way that "they" tend to carry a chip on their shoulder, so to speak. I find that many seek restitution, and act as if they have a right to be treated differently because of events in our world's past. Many other races were enslaved in the past. Many still are enslaved, not according to race. Not according to much, necessarily. But I don't think that means everyone should have to tip toe around the issue. That's ridiculous. Nigger is a word, and it is nothing without intent. But even I have to admit, I've never used the word nigger and not had a thought at the very least in the back of my mind about black people. The fact of the matter is that I never enslaved a black person, so therefore I do not owe them anything more than the common respect I would give to anyone until they give me a reason not to.
The natural reaction to receiving aggression is to become defensive, and likely aggressive in return. In your statement above, it's a cycle. You are a little defensive because a lot of black folk tend to have a "chip on their shoulder". To those types, you're probably perceived as some privileged white girl - and that in itself is some sort of aggression towards them, the fact that you might have it easy, or might have something they haven't.
Many whites (Russian, European) were sent to sugar cane plantations in the Mediterranean along with African slaves (who were gained from African slave traders). Slavery still exists, and if the focus and care was truly about slavery, then the efforts of many of these people would be focused on ending all types of slavery - not gaining reparations for the slavery of certain ancestors.
I grew up in a household where nigger was a commonly used word. My father used it a lot, but claimed not to be racist. He always said there was a difference between black people and niggers. I suppose he is correct, people are different. But why is it acceptable to differentiate between white people and crackers, and not okay to differentiate between black people and niggers?
I haven't heard anyone attempt to differentiate the difference between white people and "crackers". I've been called White Devil, White Boy, Whitey, Honky and Cracker.. the meanings are all the same, unless the person was joking.
It's entirely likely hat your ol man wasn't racist, just as the people who post "nigger" on this board aren't. That memory will haunt you though due to todays rampant PCness. But on the other hand, black households that have fathers whom use the word "cracker" or whatnot - there just isn't any stigma attached to that, no worries. And that's also because of the PCness.
I have to admit, I don't like the connotation of the word now, itself - but I do use the word. I do not use it to malign black people. I don't even have a valid reason for using it, other than it being habit that I picked up from a very young age. For example, when I drive - I have moderate road rage. Sometimes I scream "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY YOU FUCKING NIGGER" when I can plainly see that it is not a black person. Now that I see it in print, I see that I have inadvertently demeaned a person for no other reason that I know that word is generally intended to be derogatory in its meaning, and the fact that the individual it was pointed at obviously sucks at driving, according to me.
I rarely ever have or do use the word, yet I'm called racist anyway for merely being critical. Go figure!
I'm going to stop typing now, because I'm losing my train of thought and I feel that I am straying from a topic that I am seriously attempting to address. Especially since most of my attempts at serious replies here are ignored in lieu of pictures of my breasts.
Uhhmm.. can we.. ahh nevermind!