So, I left my floor associate position at my store to work as a pharmacy technician, so sadly most of my funny stories can't be repeated without violating federal law. But, I have two great ones that I can share.
Story 1
It's Black Friday, and Fridays are typically busy days for pharmacies. We have two registers, one facing out toward the main aisle and the other facing the aisle with the condoms and Monistat, among other things. Our customers form one line and we help them as we become available. Pretty simple.
So, I send someone off and this couple finishes their shopping (they are not in line in any way) and slap a value-size box of Trojan Magnum condoms and a HUGE bottle of KY on my counter. I proceed to tell them (in a very loud tone of voice) that if they want to purchase those condoms back here, they'll need to get in line and wait their turn.
They naturally went to complain to my manager. He basically tells them to go to hell. (One nice thing about working in the pharmacy is that all the pharmacists make more money than the store manager and actually care about turnover, since it takes three to six months to properly train a tech.)
--
Story 2
I usually work all weekend, I like it because it's a bit slower paced and there's fewer of the annoying sort of customer. So, I'm working register one Sunday afternoon when a woman approaches my register with a (store-brand) pregnancy test and nothing else. As I'm about to greet her, her Bluetooth headset goes off. I just silently ring her up as the following conversation ensues:
"No, I didn't buy you any beer, since you didn't put any gas in the car and I had to!"
*pause*
"Yeah, well, you know what I'm doing? I'm at the store buying a PREGNANCY TEST! And if I am pregnant, you're the father, you good-for-nothing son of a bitch! And I don't have prenatal care, not like you give a damn..."
She was literally shouting at the man, and I was trying really hard not to laugh till after she turned around. I looked inside the pharmacy proper and saw the other two techs laughing hysterically, saying, "We don't know how you just did that without laughing..."