The Free Talk Live BBS

Free Talk Live => General => Topic started by: conrad from spain on August 11, 2009, 05:35:47 PM

Title: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 11, 2009, 05:35:47 PM
My girlfriend has a smelly cat that's bringing us (i.e. me) problems. How can I kill it without her knowing it was me?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Libertarianssuck on August 11, 2009, 05:43:56 PM
Wow your gf is lucky to have you.... Why not discuss it with her? or if you wanna get rid of it that bad why not give it away and tell her it ran away.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: hellbilly on August 11, 2009, 05:45:23 PM
You put it in a box with a vial of cyanide. Seal the box, but make a switch on the outside that activates a hammer that may or may not break the vial inside the box. This way you can flip the switch even with your girlfriend present, and since the cat may or may not die, how can you be to blame?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 11, 2009, 05:51:04 PM
She loves the cat. I need it to die when I'm not there and and leave no trace that it was me. It's already 8 years old and I can't wait 3 more years. Then we can move on as a couple.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: BonerJoe on August 11, 2009, 05:56:27 PM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: fatcat on August 11, 2009, 05:59:07 PM
You put it in a box with a vial of cyanide. Seal the box, but make a switch on the outside that activates a hammer that may or may not break the vial inside the box. This way you can flip the switch even with your girlfriend present, and since the cat may or may not die, how can you be to blame?
(http://www.sciencepunk.com/v5/gallery/schrodinger.png)
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: hellbilly on August 11, 2009, 06:03:20 PM
You put it in a box with a vial of cyanide. Seal the box, but make a switch on the outside that activates a hammer that may or may not break the vial inside the box. This way you can flip the switch even with your girlfriend present, and since the cat may or may not die, how can you be to blame?
(http://www.sciencepunk.com/v5/gallery/schrodinger.png)

What a coincidence! :)
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Rillion on August 11, 2009, 06:06:31 PM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

This.  On all counts.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 11, 2009, 06:24:40 PM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE IT A BATH. I ain't doin' shit for that cat.. And yes I DO have the balls to talk about it with her. Her dead grandfather gave her that cat and she loves it dearly. The cat stays until it's dead.

Notwithstanding her undying love for it, she doesn't take care of it very well. She doesn't clean the cat box very often and the damn cat lets her know by taking a shit in the entrance way so it's the first thing you see/smell as you walk in. I'm pretty damn sure he has sprayed that whole damn house but she's so used to it that she doesn't know it. Then she calls me stuck up for not wanting to go to her house..  I try to be clever and invite her to stay at my house, thus perpetuating the neglected cat situation because she's at my house and not home to take care of the cat. The cat gets jealous and attacks her because she's never there! What a nightmare!


The truth is I DON'T have the balls to kill it.. Nor would I risk losing her because, eventually every dirty deed is uncovered. There is no perfect crime. I just ask for entertainment/educational purposes.. I can fantasize can't I???

Oh.. and even if i don't kill the cat.. I agree, I suck as a human being. No arguments there.

Can anyone at least give me some ideas of cheap stuff I can buy in a pharmacy and put it in his food?? Or maybe some kind of injection?? Any experience with this.. Just for entertainment purposes..
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: blackie on August 11, 2009, 06:36:28 PM
Use the Law of Attraction.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Libertarianssuck on August 11, 2009, 06:56:10 PM

List of plants that can prove poisonous to cats.



Alfalfa, Almond Pits, Alocasia, Amaryllis, Apple Seeds, Apple Leaf Croton,Apricot Pits, Arrowgrass, Asparagus Fern,Autumn Crocus, Avacado Fruit and Pit, Azalea,

Baneberry, Bayonet, Beargrass, Beech, Belladonna, Bird of Paradise, Bittersweet, Black Locust, Bleeding Heart,Bloodroot, Boxwood, Buckeyes,Buddist Pine, Burning Bush, Buttercup,

Caladium, Castor Bean, Ceriman,Cherry Pits, Seeds and Leaves, most varieties, Chinaberry, Christmas Rose,Chrysanthemum, Clematis, Coriaria, Cornflower, Cornstalk Plant, Corydalis, Crocus Autumn, Cuban Laurel, Cycads,Cyclamen,

Daffodil, Daphne, Deadly Nightshade,Death Camas, Delphinium, Dieffenbachia,Dracaena Palm, Dragon Tree,

Eggplant, Elderberry, Elephant Ear,Emerald Feather, Eucalyptus, Euonymus,

Ferns, Fiddle-leaf fig, Florida Beauty, Flax, Foxglove, Fruit Salad Plant,

Geranium, Giant Dumb Cane, Gold Dieffenbachia, Golden Glow, Golden Pothos,Gopher Purge,

Hellebore, Hemlock, Henbane, Holly,Honeysuckle, Horse Beans, Horse Chestnuts,Hyacinth, Hydrangea,

Indian Tobacco, Iris, Ivy, English, German, many others,

Jack in the Pulpit, Janet Craig Dracaena, Java Beans, Jessamine, Jimson Weed,Jungle Trumpets, Kalanchoe,

Lantana, Larkspur, Laurel, Lilies, Locoweed, Lupine,

Marble Queen, Marigold, Marijuana,Mescal Bean, Mexican Breadfruit, Mistletoe,Mock Orange, Morning Glory, Mother-in Law's Tongue, Mountain Laurel, Mushrooms,

Narcissus, Nephytis, Oleander, Onion,

Peach Pits & Leaves, Peony, Periwinkle, Philodendron, Pimpernel, Plumosa Fern, Poinsettia, Pokeweed, Poppy, Potato,Precatory Bean, Primrose, Privet,

Red Emerald, Red Margined Dracaena,Rhododendron, Rhubarb,Rosemary Pea,Rubber Plant,

Sago Palm, Schefflera, Scotch Broom,Skunk Cabbage, Snowdrops, Staggerweed,Star of Bethlehem, String of Pearls,Sweetpea, Swiss Cheese plant,

Tansy Mustard, Tobacco, Tomato - Green Fruit Stem and Leaves, Tropic Snow Dieffenbachia, Tulip, Tung Tree,

Virginia Creeper, Weeping Fig, Wild Call, Wisteria, Yews, Japanese, American, English, Western.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: blackie on August 11, 2009, 07:00:22 PM
ANTIFREEZE (ETHYLENE GLYCOL)

Poisoning with antifreeze is one of the most common poisoning conditions found in cats because ethylene glycol has a sweet taste that appeals to cats and dogs. One teaspoon of antifreeze can kill an average-sized cat. Signs of toxicity, which appear suddenly, are vomiting, uncoordinated gait (seems "drunk"), weakness, stupor and coma. Death can occur in 12 to 36 hours. Convulsions are unusual. Cats that recover from the acute poisoning may have damage to their kidneys and go on to kidney failure.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 11, 2009, 07:16:23 PM
ANTIFREEZE (ETHYLENE GLYCOL)

Poisoning with antifreeze is one of the most common poisoning conditions found in cats because ethylene glycol has a sweet taste that appeals to cats and dogs. One teaspoon of antifreeze can kill an average-sized cat. Signs of toxicity, which appear suddenly, are vomiting, uncoordinated gait (seems "drunk"), weakness, stupor and coma. Death can occur in 12 to 36 hours. Convulsions are unusual. Cats that recover from the acute poisoning may have damage to their kidneys and go on to kidney failure.

Now we're getting somewhere.. But how can I leave anti-freeze out without her knowing? And there's no guarantee that the cat will drink the anti-freeze..

Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 11, 2009, 07:16:54 PM
ANTIFREEZE (ETHYLENE GLYCOL)



oh, that's fucking cold, blacko.....(course, i immediately had the same idea)


a: drown it in a cloth bag in the tub & throw it in a dumpster, the day they're gonna empty it.
b: get rat poison (or some other large rodent/animal poison) & mix it w/ cat food.
c: throw it out a window
d: ask john shaw for other ideas
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: davann on August 11, 2009, 07:37:46 PM

The truth is I DON'T have the balls to kill it.. Nor would I risk losing her because, eventually every dirty deed is uncovered.

Here's my  business card for "Dirty Deeds, Done Dirty Cheap!".

Contact me and arrange for me to fly out. I know more then one way to skin a cat. Would you be interested in my speciality of disposing of the carcass via the Fried Green Tomato style? Costs a little extra but you and your gal get a nice meal.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 11, 2009, 08:10:37 PM
get a nice meal.


fuckin' a....i forgot option

e: sell/give to local chinee place (helps to have added teriyaki sauce to cat food for 2 wks prior.....ahhh-soo...marinated from de inside)
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Evil Muppet on August 11, 2009, 08:25:30 PM
What kind of sick motherfucker would seriously be trying to kill his girlfriend's cat?   I hope she realizes what kind of sadistic asshole you are and dumps your ass.  Because you think that your girlfriend is a slob you want to kill her pets?  What the fuck are you going to do if you have children with this woman?  Murder your firstborn because your wife wasn't quick enough with wiping your child's ass?   


Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 11, 2009, 08:32:48 PM
  What the fuck are you going to do if you have children with this woman?  Murder your firstborn because your wife wasn't quick enough with wiping your child's ass?   

don't be a twat.
old/dying, shit-ass cat & a human child are not to be compared.
only a douchebag (like you) would equate the two....you must(or will be) some aged cunt w/ 37 cats & no other human interaction in your life..
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Diogenes The Cynic on August 11, 2009, 08:48:34 PM
The simpliest solution is the best. tell your girlfriend she has a smelly pussy, and you wont have physical contact untill she cleans it.

OR

Kill the cat with mercury. buy a few glass thermometers, and put the mercury in an eyedroopr. when the cat is asleep and your girlfriend isnt looking, drop a drop on its back. the mercury will seep through its skin, and after a few weeks of doing this, it will die.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 11, 2009, 08:54:38 PM
mercury & a-freeze = slow & painful
chinee place = quik n easy....and tasty
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Andy on August 11, 2009, 08:58:01 PM
Quote
The simpliest solution is the best. tell your girlfriend she has a smelly pussy, and you wont have physical contact untill she cleans it.

 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Evil Muppet on August 11, 2009, 11:46:34 PM
  What the fuck are you going to do if you have children with this woman?  Murder your firstborn because your wife wasn't quick enough with wiping your child's ass?   

don't be a twat.
old/dying, shit-ass cat & a human child are not to be compared.
only a douchebag (like you) would equate the two....you must(or will be) some aged cunt w/ 37 cats & no other human interaction in your life..

No.  Its just an indication of the type of person they are.  If they are neglectful in one area then they will be neglectful in another. 

Only a fucking shit stain like you would fail to draw the proper inferences.  Now go fuck yourself. 
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: therealritasue on August 12, 2009, 12:58:22 AM
If the OP isn't a fakepost, then the dude is a total shit stain.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: BonerJoe on August 12, 2009, 01:08:52 AM
Quote
The simpliest solution is the best. tell your girlfriend she has a smelly pussy, and you wont have physical contact untill she cleans it.

 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

My job is done.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 12, 2009, 04:12:31 AM
The simpliest solution is the best. tell your girlfriend she has a smelly pussy, and you wont have physical contact untill she cleans it.

She cleans it.. but she spends a day at my house, then we spend a day at her house.. and there the shit is in the door welcoming us when we walk in..

Which brings me to another smelly pussy story..

When we had only been dating one month, she told me that in the vacant lot next to her living room window, a stray cat had died. She tried contacting the owner but they got no response. She then tried contacting the city hall to see if they would clean it up, and as you might guess, they don't get up off their fat asses ever.

She tried the owner again, but no dice..

I must add that she's a squeemish girl who loves cats, and she wasn't capable of cleaning up a dead stray cat. By this time the cat really started to smell and the stench was permeating the house and she was having company that night. I (reluctantly) volunteered to remove the dead cat.. It was horrible!! I jumped out the window with some bags, picked the damn thing up and a 6in diameter ball of maggots fell out!

I happened to have my camera in my pocket and snapped a quick one to share with you all nice folks:
(http://i731.photobucket.com/albums/ww319/connradilius/P5160073.jpg)

I almost threw up!! If I had been thinking clearer, I would have made a video because you could see all the maggots wiggling.

I eventually bagged the cat and it went to a dumpster and I re-evaluated my love for this girl. She passed the test, but we still have smelly pussy problems.


Kill the cat with mercury. buy a few glass thermometers, and put the mercury in an eyedroopr. when the cat is asleep and your girlfriend isnt looking, drop a drop on its back. the mercury will seep through its skin, and after a few weeks of doing this, it will die.
I think the risk is too high. I'd have to do it repeated times while she is home. And if I got caught, how would I explain the eyedropper with mercury in it?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: kalmia on August 12, 2009, 07:18:00 AM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE IT A BATH. I ain't doin' shit for that cat.. And yes I DO have the balls to talk about it with her. Her dead grandfather gave her that cat and she loves it dearly. The cat stays until it's dead.

Notwithstanding her undying love for it, she doesn't take care of it very well. She doesn't clean the cat box very often and the damn cat lets her know by taking a shit in the entrance way so it's the first thing you see/smell as you walk in. I'm pretty damn sure he has sprayed that whole damn house but she's so used to it that she doesn't know it. Then she calls me stuck up for not wanting to go to her house..  I try to be clever and invite her to stay at my house, thus perpetuating the neglected cat situation because she's at my house and not home to take care of the cat. The cat gets jealous and attacks her because she's never there! What a nightmare!


[...]

Take a shit in the entry way to her place.  When she complains.  Tell her that that is the way that her cat makes you feel.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 12, 2009, 07:32:42 AM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE IT A BATH. I ain't doin' shit for that cat.. And yes I DO have the balls to talk about it with her. Her dead grandfather gave her that cat and she loves it dearly. The cat stays until it's dead.

Notwithstanding her undying love for it, she doesn't take care of it very well. She doesn't clean the cat box very often and the damn cat lets her know by taking a shit in the entrance way so it's the first thing you see/smell as you walk in. I'm pretty damn sure he has sprayed that whole damn house but she's so used to it that she doesn't know it. Then she calls me stuck up for not wanting to go to her house..  I try to be clever and invite her to stay at my house, thus perpetuating the neglected cat situation because she's at my house and not home to take care of the cat. The cat gets jealous and attacks her because she's never there! What a nightmare!


[...]

Take a shit in the entry way to her place.  When she complains.  Tell her that that is the way that her cat makes you feel.

There's an idea!! I'll get back to you to let you know about her reaction.. What's your prediction?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 12, 2009, 08:44:38 AM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

This
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Disaster Monkey on August 12, 2009, 08:51:50 AM
Shoot it when she's not home ... blame the DEA.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 12, 2009, 08:53:07 AM
Give it a bath.

Otherwise, you suck as a human.

Both for wanting to kill a cat and not having the balls to discuss it with your girlfriend.

I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE IT A BATH. I ain't doin' shit for that cat.. And yes I DO have the balls to talk about it with her. Her dead grandfather gave her that cat and she loves it dearly. The cat stays until it's dead.

Notwithstanding her undying love for it, she doesn't take care of it very well. She doesn't clean the cat box very often and the damn cat lets her know by taking a shit in the entrance way so it's the first thing you see/smell as you walk in. I'm pretty damn sure he has sprayed that whole damn house but she's so used to it that she doesn't know it. Then she calls me stuck up for not wanting to go to her house..  I try to be clever and invite her to stay at my house, thus perpetuating the neglected cat situation because she's at my house and not home to take care of the cat. The cat gets jealous and attacks her because she's never there! What a nightmare!


The truth is I DON'T have the balls to kill it.. Nor would I risk losing her because, eventually every dirty deed is uncovered. There is no perfect crime. I just ask for entertainment/educational purposes.. I can fantasize can't I???

Oh.. and even if i don't kill the cat.. I agree, I suck as a human being. No arguments there.

Can anyone at least give me some ideas of cheap stuff I can buy in a pharmacy and put it in his food?? Or maybe some kind of injection?? Any experience with this.. Just for entertainment purposes..

I don't see what's so hard about giving a cat a bath...  jus make sure that you cut his nails first, or you will regret it.  Then make sure that you have the water drawn, put him in the tub firmly, yet gently, give him a bath, lather him up, and dry him....  it's always funny seeing a wet cat...  LOL  Better yet, give him a bath, and keep him inside, and he will never need a bath again.

As far as the litter box problem goes, I'm looking into getting one of these:  http://www.catgenie.com/ (http://www.catgenie.com/).  A little expensive, yes, but think of it this way....  No more scooping, no more smell, no more litter!

One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women.  Male cats seem to behave like that best friend from high school that came out of the closet... 
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Rillion on August 12, 2009, 10:40:39 AM
One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women. 

I have never once torn up, shat on, or puked on someone's bed because I was angry at them.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: davann on August 12, 2009, 11:12:22 AM
One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women. 

I have never once torn up, shat on, or puked on someone's bed because I was angry at them.

You just haven't been mad enough yet. Get married and wait a few weeks.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Manuel_OKelly on August 12, 2009, 11:50:49 AM
So you don't love your Girlfriend? Is that why you want her to suffer?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 12, 2009, 12:23:11 PM

No.  Its just an indication of the type of person they are.  If they are neglectful in one area then they will be neglectful in another. 


you are such a tool.
cats, regardless of how many times you bathe the fucking things, are nasty by nature..
they bring dead animals into the house;
they spray, shit & piss all over the fucking place. the OP has said as much...try to keep up.
it has nothing to do w/ neglect.
i shot & killed a neighbors cat for repeatedly spraying & pissing in my barn. (cat owners are also a tad arrogant; where dog owners must keep a tight rein on their dogs, cat people assume they should get a free pass w/ outdoor cats)

this doesn't mean i'm going to throw my kid out a 2nd story window, cuz it shit or pissed in the bed while not wearing a diaper.
for YOU to make such assumptions about such a scenario makes YOU the fucking DOUCHEBAG.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Icculi on August 12, 2009, 01:17:59 PM

As far as the litter box problem goes, I'm looking into getting one of these:  http://www.catgenie.com/ (http://www.catgenie.com/).  A little expensive, yes, but think of it this way....  No more scooping, no more smell, no more litter!

One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women.  Male cats seem to behave like that best friend from high school that came out of the closet... 

The cat genie looks pretty cool.  I got a litter robot http://www.litter-robot.com/ (http://www.litter-robot.com/)  a couple of years ago, and it is so awesome!  It looks kinda goofy, but works so well.  Just have to make sure you get the clumping litter.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 12, 2009, 03:03:16 PM
One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women.

I have never once torn up, shat on, or puked on someone's bed because I was angry at them.

You should have seen my last girlfriend.....
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 12, 2009, 03:04:33 PM

As far as the litter box problem goes, I'm looking into getting one of these:  http://www.catgenie.com/ (http://www.catgenie.com/).  A little expensive, yes, but think of it this way....  No more scooping, no more smell, no more litter!

One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women.  Male cats seem to behave like that best friend from high school that came out of the closet... 

The cat genie looks pretty cool.  I got a litter robot http://www.litter-robot.com/ (http://www.litter-robot.com/)  a couple of years ago, and it is so awesome!  It looks kinda goofy, but works so well.  Just have to make sure you get the clumping litter.

Stay away from the litter maid....  it's the biggst piece of shit in the universe.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 12, 2009, 03:08:01 PM

No.  Its just an indication of the type of person they are.  If they are neglectful in one area then they will be neglectful in another. 


you are such a tool.
cats, regardless of how many times you bathe the fucking things, are nasty by nature..
they bring dead animals into the house;
they spray, shit & piss all over the fucking place. the OP has said as much...try to keep up.
it has nothing to do w/ neglect.
i shot & killed a neighbors cat for repeatedly spraying & pissing in my barn. (cat owners are also a tad arrogant; where dog owners must keep a tight rein on their dogs, cat people assume they should get a free pass w/ outdoor cats)

this doesn't mean i'm going to throw my kid out a 2nd story window, cuz it shit or pissed in the bed while not wearing a diaper.
for YOU to make such assumptions about such a scenario makes YOU the fucking DOUCHEBAG.


LOL  That's why my cats are 100% indoor cats.  I've never had these problems with any of the cats that I've owned.  It's pretty crazy to have an outdoor cat if you ask me.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: BonerJoe on August 12, 2009, 03:18:56 PM
Stay away from the litter maid....  it's the biggst piece of shit in the universe.

Haha, it's true.

$140 wasted.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 12, 2009, 03:50:24 PM


LOL  That's why my cats are 100% indoor cats.  I've never had these problems with any of the cats that I've owned.  It's pretty crazy to have an outdoor cat if you ask me.

see?
you're a wise man, balloonguy..
had my neighbor kept his cat(s) inside, it would still be alive.
not to mention the fact that the songbird population has been decimated over the last 20 years or so, by domesticated >outdoor<cats
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Bill Brasky on August 12, 2009, 11:35:30 PM
The cat is not the problem.

Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: miamiballoonguy on August 13, 2009, 08:59:19 AM


LOL  That's why my cats are 100% indoor cats.  I've never had these problems with any of the cats that I've owned.  It's pretty crazy to have an outdoor cat if you ask me.

see?
you're a wise man, balloonguy..
had my neighbor kept his cat(s) inside, it would still be alive.
not to mention the fact that the songbird population has been decimated over the last 20 years or so, by domesticated >outdoor<cats

Songbirds are annoying.
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: libertylover on August 13, 2009, 12:25:03 PM
Print out advertisements for Cat Genie http://www.statelinetack.com/item/cat-genie-self-washing-self-flushing-litter-box/213500%20GEN/?srccode=SBIZRATE&mr:referralID=0173ec96-8823-11de-989b-000423bb4e79 (http://www.statelinetack.com/item/cat-genie-self-washing-self-flushing-litter-box/213500%20GEN/?srccode=SBIZRATE&mr:referralID=0173ec96-8823-11de-989b-000423bb4e79)  then place them around the home.  Maybe the girlfriend will get the hint.  If you really like her you might even get the device for her.   

Also, find a vet with a grooming service and have them identify the smell.  If it is because the cat is spraying have them fixed.  You could suggest this to the girlfriend as well.   Again leave ads for vets around the home.  http://www.catsofaustralia.com/cat-spraying-urine.htm (http://www.catsofaustralia.com/cat-spraying-urine.htm)  I found this very helpful concerning spraying behavior one approach is to dope the cat which could be amusing on another level. 

Considering the cat is an emotional connection to a relative.  It might be better in the long run to at least attempt to cure the animal before you give up.   I am not as sentimental as some.  I had a dog who was old and had a serious skin disorder which the vet said he couldn't do much for the odor.  Also the animal was suffering from the irritation so I made the choice to have him put down. 

My husband's family dog was like 14 years old and smelled something horrible.  It most likely had cancer and there was no fixing the situation.  Everyone was shocked when I suggested that it might be best to have the animal put down.   I suppose this comes from the fact that I was raised on a farm and my Father supplemented our meat supply by fishing and hunting.  It kind of makes a person more pragmatic. 

Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: conrad from spain on August 13, 2009, 01:49:30 PM
Thanks for the comments. The cat genie would be perfect, but it's not available with European voltage. I emailed them and they confirmed it. It would solve the problem though.



Don't worry, I'm not going to kill the cat.. Even though I want to..
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: blackie on August 13, 2009, 01:57:58 PM
The cat genie would be perfect, but it's not available with European voltage. I emailed them and they confirmed it. It would solve the problem though.
Get a voltage converter.

http://www.voltageconverters.com/itemdesc.asp?ic=VC200W

Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Diogenes The Cynic on August 13, 2009, 03:57:18 PM
One thing that I've noticed is that a lot of men don't like cats...  the way I look at it, female cats usually behave like human women. 

I have never once torn up, shat on, or puked on someone's bed because I was angry at them.

Not even once?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Diogenes The Cynic on August 13, 2009, 04:51:44 PM
Quote
The simpliest solution is the best. tell your girlfriend she has a smelly pussy, and you wont have physical contact untill she cleans it.

 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

My job is done.

How so?
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Riddler on August 13, 2009, 05:26:18 PM
Don't worry, I'm not going to kill the cat.. Even though I want to..

well then, what a fine waste of time this thread has been
Title: Re: Smelly Cat
Post by: Evil Muppet on August 13, 2009, 10:45:12 PM
[youtube=425,350]k8qMr7Js8e0[/youtube].