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Author Topic: Rules to live by-  (Read 5076 times)

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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2013, 01:27:24 AM »

He's telling you, he'll punch you in the face.

I think that's beautiful advice.

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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #16 on: January 25, 2013, 01:29:09 AM »

<<

I have a gargoyle sitting atop my chair.

Its very weird.

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Turd Ferguson

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #17 on: January 25, 2013, 01:35:43 AM »

If you knew what was healthy, you'd GTFO of there.
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Some peoples idea of hell is having to mind their own business.

Laetitia

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #18 on: January 27, 2013, 04:20:27 PM »

Never trust a woman. 

Never trust a womanly man.

Never trust a manly woman.


Will add these to the list, right after...

Never trust a man. They're all assholes, just to varying degrees.

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Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of experience comes from bad judgment.

Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #19 on: January 27, 2013, 10:58:50 PM »

Never trust a woman. 

Never trust a womanly man.

Never trust a manly woman.


Will add these to the list, right after...

Never trust a man. They're all assholes, just to varying degrees.



You know how they say "Behind every great man..."

That applies to assholish men, too.

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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #20 on: January 27, 2013, 11:05:32 PM »

Next rule, never offer to change a tire for anyone. 

Ripping the heads off the bolts is far too easy. 

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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #21 on: January 27, 2013, 11:28:49 PM »

Getting drunk is an excuse for everything but murder and rape.

Getting drunk is not an excuse for anything, but a catalyst for mayhem.



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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #22 on: January 27, 2013, 11:38:48 PM »

That's why you gotta pound on the lugnuts with a hammer and socket to loosen up the corrosion first.

They come off fine.  Putting them back on, I didn't know they were slightly stronger than Boardwalk Taffy. 

Fuck foreign bolts. 

Back in my day, when cars were built by men, forged from steel, the threaded lugs would extend from the wheel - through the rim. 

Now they have these faggoty bolts that thread into the wheel assembly.  Goddamn cunts. 


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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #23 on: January 27, 2013, 11:57:05 PM »

Read a book once in a while. 

...and not Facebook.

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Turd Ferguson

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #24 on: January 28, 2013, 12:51:49 AM »

Never bring a young child into a movie theater, unless it's one of those Boy In The Bubble types. Those are ok.
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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #25 on: January 31, 2013, 11:34:47 PM »

Never bring a young child into a movie theater, unless it's one of those Boy In The Bubble types. Those are ok.

They make a good shield.

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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #26 on: January 31, 2013, 11:38:44 PM »

If your name is Tatum O'Neil, never marry Channing Tatum.

Because, you're gonna be Tatum Tatum.  And if you're a big cokehead, like Tatum O'Neil, it'd be weird to hear Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum Tatum, every time you walk into a party. 



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Turd Ferguson

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #27 on: February 02, 2013, 02:52:05 AM »

Never put cigarette butts in a urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light.
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Some peoples idea of hell is having to mind their own business.

Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #28 on: February 03, 2013, 10:09:48 PM »

Never put cigarette butts in a urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light.

It makes the ice cubes dirty.
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Bill Brasky

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Re: Rules to live by-
« Reply #29 on: February 03, 2013, 10:11:37 PM »

Next advice-

Be nice when you can, and be mean when you have to.

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