Welcome to the Free Talk Live bulletin board system!
This board is closed to new users and new posts.  Thank you to all our great mods and users over the years.  Details here.
185859 Posts in 9829 Topics by 1371 Members
Latest Member: cjt26
Home Help
+  The Free Talk Live BBS
|-+  Free Talk Live
| |-+  General
| | |-+  Jokes
Pages: 1 ... 3 4 [5] 6 7 ... 27   Go Down

Author Topic: Jokes  (Read 109410 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Riddler

  • Guest
Re: Jokes
« Reply #60 on: February 05, 2009, 05:55:01 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.


naw... i cheated on the 2nd....
took me a minute........the fucking BIG-ASS HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sombrero
my folks brought back 2 REAL SIZE of these fuckers from TJ, or Mex city,  back in the early 70's....i think they're still around..
i don't know HOW the fuck they got 'em on the plane, tatoo
« Last Edit: February 05, 2009, 05:57:30 PM by Wino »
Logged

CaL DaVe

  • No hay igual.
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2037
  • Que onda guero?
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #61 on: February 05, 2009, 05:59:30 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.


naw... i cheated on the 2nd....
took me a minute........the fucking BIG-ASS HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sombrero

Cheated? I would have never guessed either one of those.

+1 for getting the first one.

Perhaps the fact that you got the answer without looking proves you are a racist after all?!?!?  :P
Logged
Pocho

orion

  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 330
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #62 on: February 05, 2009, 06:07:22 PM »

What are the following drawings of?
...
Pro tip: You just need to click on quote to read the small print.
Answer Left:Black man in a well
Answer Right:Mexican on a bike

Those are some large bike tires.
Logged

CaL DaVe

  • No hay igual.
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2037
  • Que onda guero?
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #63 on: February 05, 2009, 06:15:57 PM »

What are the following drawings of?
...
Pro tip: You just need to click on quote to read the small print.
Answer Left:Black man in a well
Answer Right:Mexican on a bike

Those are some large bike tires.

Your right. I drew it reeeally quick in AutoCAD but that is no excuse for not drawing things to scale.

A drafter always draws to scale!
Logged
Pocho

Riddler

  • Guest
Re: Jokes
« Reply #64 on: February 05, 2009, 06:19:20 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.


naw... i cheated on the 2nd....
took me a minute........the fucking BIG-ASS HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sombrero

Cheated? I would have never guessed either one of those.

+1 for getting the first one.

Perhaps the fact that you got the answer without looking proves you are a racist after all?!?!?  :P


nigga, i WROTE the joke
Logged

CaL DaVe

  • No hay igual.
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2037
  • Que onda guero?
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #65 on: February 05, 2009, 06:25:29 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.


naw... i cheated on the 2nd....
took me a minute........the fucking BIG-ASS HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sombrero

Cheated? I would have never guessed either one of those.

+1 for getting the first one.

Perhaps the fact that you got the answer without looking proves you are a racist after all?!?!?  :P


nigga, i WROTE the joke

Well I didn't know I's talking to D legend himself. Shiiit!
Logged
Pocho

Riddler

  • Guest
Re: Jokes
« Reply #66 on: February 05, 2009, 06:32:40 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.


naw... i cheated on the 2nd....
took me a minute........the fucking BIG-ASS HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sombrero

Cheated? I would have never guessed either one of those.

+1 for getting the first one.

Perhaps the fact that you got the answer without looking proves you are a racist after all?!?!?  :P


nigga, i WROTE the joke

Well I didn't know I's talking to D legend himself. Shiiit!

i lie (hard 2 believe)
a bartender-buddy of mine....a 2-tour viet-nam dude, showed me this years ago.
fuckin guy has more jokes under his hat.........
Logged

John Shaw

  • Global Moderator
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 17244
    • View Profile
    • Think Twice Productions
Re: Jokes
« Reply #67 on: February 05, 2009, 08:10:26 PM »

I heard those jokes when I was six or seven from another kid at school. Probably 1980 or so. It's easy to draw the little figures.

The first one can also be answered "Mice eating cheese"
Logged
"btw its not a claim. Its documented fact."

CaL DaVe

  • No hay igual.
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2037
  • Que onda guero?
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #68 on: February 05, 2009, 08:13:25 PM »

The first one can also be answered "Mice eating cheese"

I think that's funnier. 
Logged
Pocho

sterlingnickle

  • Guest
Re: Jokes
« Reply #69 on: February 23, 2009, 03:37:36 PM »

"Endangered species"

One beautiful autumn day, a Park Ranger discovered a man sitting in the woods chewing away on a dead Bald Eagle. "Hey mister, the Bald Eagle is a protected species, and killing one is punishable offence", said the Park Ranger.

The man was swiftly arrested, and ushered before the judge.

In court, he pleaded innocent to the charges against him, claiming that if he didn't eat the bald eagle he would have died from starvation.

"I was so hungry" complained the defensive camper, "the Bald Eagle was the only food I could find!"

To everyone's amazement, the judge ruled in his favor.

In the judge's closing statement he asked the man, "I would like you to tell me something before I let you go. I have never eaten a bald eagle, nor ever plan on it. But I'd like to know: What did it taste like?"

The man answered, "Well, it tasted like a cross between a Whooping Crane and a Spotted Owl."

Logged

sterlingnickle

  • Guest
Re: Jokes
« Reply #70 on: March 19, 2009, 12:12:58 PM »

Subject: Update on the war in Iraq...

The Department Of Defense briefed the president this morning. They told OBAMA that 2 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq . To everyone's surprise, all the color drained from Obama's face.


Then he collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken, almost in tears.


Finally, he composed himself and asked, 'Just how many is a brazilian?' This is especially funny since he obviously has no understanding of billion or trillion either.

Logged

mikehz

  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8033
    • View Profile
    • Day by Day
Re: Jokes
« Reply #71 on: March 19, 2009, 12:27:50 PM »

Subject: Update on the war in Iraq...

The Department Of Defense briefed the president this morning. They told OBAMA that 2 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq . To everyone's surprise, all the color drained from Obama's face.


Then he collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken, almost in tears.


Finally, he composed himself and asked, 'Just how many is a brazilian?' This is especially funny since he obviously has no understanding of billion or trillion either.



Heard this one last year, except it was a Bush joke.

Now, it's not as funny, since we all know Obama probably knows what Brazil is.
Logged
"Force always attracts men of low morality." Albert Einstein

Sam Gunn (since nobody got Admiral Naismith)

  • A Cut Above The Rest
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8299
  • If government is the answer, the question is stupi
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #72 on: March 26, 2009, 01:11:56 AM »

A man is visiting a doctor, asks if he will live to be 100.
Doc asks "Do you drink, smoke, ride motorcycles, or chase women?"
"No of couse not" he replies!
Then why would you want to live to be 100?
Logged
"Do not throw rocks at people with guns." —Hastings' Third Law
"Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today." —Herman Wouk 

"If you want total security, go to prison. There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on. The only thing lacking... is freedom." - Dwight D. Eisenhower

conrad from spain

  • Irrumator
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 209
  • odi et amo
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #73 on: March 26, 2009, 05:29:56 AM »

A man visiting the doctor gets the bad news, "You only have two weeks to live."

The man, very distraught at this terrible notice, asks, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Well," says the doctor, "no alcohol, no cigarrettes, no drugs and no women."

"Will that make me live longer?"

"No," answers the doctor, "but they'll be the longest two weeks of your life!!"
Logged

CaL DaVe

  • No hay igual.
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2037
  • Que onda guero?
    • View Profile
Re: Jokes
« Reply #74 on: March 26, 2009, 12:31:44 PM »

What's the difference between free sex and sex you pay for?



Sex you pay for is usually cheaper.
Logged
Pocho
Pages: 1 ... 3 4 [5] 6 7 ... 27   Go Up
+  The Free Talk Live BBS
|-+  Free Talk Live
| |-+  General
| | |-+  Jokes

// ]]>

Page created in 0.025 seconds with 33 queries.