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Author Topic: Jokes  (Read 109399 times)

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sterlingnickle

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #45 on: February 01, 2009, 03:19:34 PM »

  A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and
 tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the
 cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches
 from a large plate glass window.
 
 For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, and then the still
shaking driver said, 'I'm sorry but you scared the daylights out of
 me.'

  The frightened passenger apologised to the driver and said he didn't
 realise a mere tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much.
 
 The driver replied, 'No, no, I'm sorry, it's entirely my fault.
 Today is my first day driving a cab. I've been driving a hearse for
 the last 25 years.'
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John Shaw

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #46 on: February 01, 2009, 07:04:30 PM »

Two detectives in New Mexico were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.

"How was he killed?" asked one detective.

"With a golf gun," the other detective replied.

"A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?" asked the first detective.

"I don't know," replied the second guy, "but it sure made a hole in Juan."
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"btw its not a claim. Its documented fact."

Riddler

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #47 on: February 01, 2009, 07:37:22 PM »

pedro notices his cousin juan keeps getting richer & richer, decked out in gold & diamonds, shiny new rolls royce, literally throwing money around.
"que pasa, juan?  how you afford all dees mowing lawns? sheet, man, you don' even work no more."
"pedro, is easy, bro. i go up to white people, like a beggar, an say, "please senor, i only need 50 dollars more to go back to mexico."
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anarchir

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #48 on: February 01, 2009, 08:48:26 PM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.
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Riddler

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #49 on: February 01, 2009, 08:51:09 PM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.


your'e welcome.

see rillion, i actually have people enjoying mah jokes...
you?????

[youtube=425,350]CQFEY9RIRJA[/youtube]


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Rillion

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #50 on: February 02, 2009, 08:59:52 AM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.


your'e welcome.

see rillion, i actually have people enjoying mah jokes...
you?????

Yeah, there are people who will laugh at anything.  I might've  laughed at the black eye joke myself, if it hadn't been the 3,000th time I'd heard it. 
« Last Edit: February 02, 2009, 09:12:40 AM by Rillion »
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Keels

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #51 on: February 02, 2009, 10:34:17 AM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.



I think most girls with a sense of humor would laugh...unless you were beating her while telling it to her.

then it's not so funny. :(
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anarchir

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #52 on: February 02, 2009, 04:43:15 PM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.



I think most girls with a sense of humor would laugh...unless you were beating her while telling it to her.

then it's not so funny. :(

I was beating her actually.
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anarchir

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #53 on: February 02, 2009, 04:43:50 PM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.



I think most girls with a sense of humor would laugh...unless you were beating her while telling it to her.

then it's not so funny. :(

I was beating her actually. . . . at pool! ZING!
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Keels

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #54 on: February 03, 2009, 07:30:08 AM »

I told my main girl the one about not needing to tell a girl anything if she has two black eyes and she actually found it amusing.



I think most girls with a sense of humor would laugh...unless you were beating her while telling it to her.

then it's not so funny. :(

I was beating her actually. . . . at pool! ZING!


ZING indeed.
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John Shaw

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #55 on: February 05, 2009, 02:37:30 PM »

What sound does a collapsing mine make?


A Flat Minor.
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CaL DaVe

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #56 on: February 05, 2009, 03:04:15 PM »

What are the following drawings of?



Pro tip: You just need to click on quote to read the small print.
Answer Left:Black man in a well
Answer Right:Mexican on a bike
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Pocho

Riddler

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #57 on: February 05, 2009, 03:43:16 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???
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Rillion

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #58 on: February 05, 2009, 05:21:16 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 
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CaL DaVe

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #59 on: February 05, 2009, 05:44:20 PM »

without cheatin
1st one is, >>>the last thing a black guy sees after being thrown into a well.
2nd one ???

My first thought was "pierced nipple," but I turned out to be wrong. 

Let me know if the answers need more explanation.
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Pocho
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