J.C. Keyser's House of Booze

[Lindsey]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Okay, no whiskey for you.  If the campfire is more appealing than I am, I think I'd go drown myself in the nearest puddle.   

[Keels]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Okay, no whiskey for you.  If the campfire is more appealing than I am, I think I'd go drown myself in the nearest puddle.   

Ive seen some pretty hot campfires.

[jimmed]

If the campfire is more appealing than I am, I think I'd go drown myself in the nearest puddle.   

Here we go again...

[Bill Brasky]

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Sounds expensive.

If we do it in Mexico, the most expensive thing would be the hammer.

That's because you have to buy a $10k hammer license from the corrupt police.

I'd probably be the only guy ever busted for trying to smuggle a hammer into Mexico. 

[Keels]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Whiskey is something else. I wouldnt remember, but no one but the animals will see the blackout.

Me, you, Brasky, Lindz...one sleeping bag.

[Lindsey]

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Sounds expensive.

If we do it in Mexico, the most expensive thing would be the hammer.

That's because you have to buy a $10k hammer license from the corrupt police.

I'd probably be the only guy ever busted for trying to smuggle a hammer into Mexico. 

I would laugh so hard...

You know, before we bailed you out and all. 

[jckeyser]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Whiskey is something else. I wouldnt remember, but no one but the animals will see the blackout.

Me, you, Brasky, Lindz...one sleeping bag.

That would be a messy bag, fo sho.

[jckeyser]

Speaking of two dicks in one place, Bob's not lurking around tonight I guess.
He would have loved that last bit.

[jimmed]

Speaking of two dicks in one place, Bob's not lurking around tonight I guess.
He would have loved that last bit.

He's too busy thinking of more bad stories to tell about his ex.

[Keels]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Whiskey is something else. I wouldnt remember, but no one but the animals will see the blackout.

Me, you, Brasky, Lindz...one sleeping bag.

That would be a messy bag, fo sho.

SHO NUFF, BROTHA. i CONCUR.

y u so hyphy?

[Lindsey]

Speaking of two dicks in one place, Bob's not lurking around tonight I guess.
He would have loved that last bit.

He's unavailable for comment right now.  Please leave a message at the ballsack. 

[jckeyser]

Speaking of two dicks in one place, Bob's not lurking around tonight I guess.
He would have loved that last bit.

He's too busy thinking of more bad stories to tell about his ex.

I've heard these...

[Bill Brasky]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Okay, no whiskey for you.  If the campfire is more appealing than I am, I think I'd go drown myself in the nearest puddle.   

You just don't understand what happens when I drink the Magic Potion. 

Nobody does.  I sure as hell don't. 

[jckeyser]

Bottles? 

Those are heavy.  Special occasions or when I'm out.  And when out, only for use as a potential melee' weapon. 

I aughta get my keg-fixin's apparatus out of hibernation.

Lets go camping goddammit.

I'll need fire, a liver donor, and three women who like to get naked and perform lezbionics by lantern light.  And a hammer. 

Well, no funny stuff without Lindsey and/or Keels, but I say also whiskey. And a massive dead animal to eat raw from the bone like wolves.

With whisky, I will fuck the campfire and piss on the women. 

What the hell, I havent been camping in a while.  Lets do it. 

Okay, no whiskey for you.  If the campfire is more appealing than I am, I think I'd go drown myself in the nearest puddle.   

You just don't understand what happens when I drink the Magic Potion. 

Nobody does.  I sure as hell don't. 

I'd rather not remember half the shit i do when Wild Turkey is present.

[jimmed]

You just don't understand what happens when I drink the Magic Potion. 

Nobody does.  I sure as hell don't. 

Get an HD video cam and a domain name. People would pay for that shit.