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Author Topic: Dating Rant  (Read 106879 times)

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ForumTroll

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #30 on: July 18, 2010, 01:21:27 AM »

Embrace your homosexuality.

You sound like you want me to embrace your man-pole. Not gonna happen, I'm as straight as they come.

Whatever makes you feel better about your gayness.
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Diogenes The Cynic

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #31 on: July 18, 2010, 01:26:32 AM »

The entire time while reading this I cannot stop thinking of this:


Ugh, I wonder what other stereotypes I conjure up/conform to.
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Diogenes The Cynic

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #32 on: July 18, 2010, 01:32:28 AM »

I'd suggest you try not to limit yourself to the "official matchmaker" stuff.  Why can't you meet a nice observant girl at synagogue yourself?  Of course you know I'm not a chabbadnik and do my own thing.  But I doubt I'd ever subscribe to such a system.  I wouldn't give up on it though, I could see myself being pleasantly surprised with it, but I think I'd rather find my own ladies myself.  I also wouldn't suggest you try to rush getting married.  My parents married at age 30 and had 4 kids and could have had more if they wanted to.  I think that's my plan too.

Quizzically enough, girls don't show up to shul here.

It was different in our parents age because it was normal for them to get married later on in life.
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Rillion

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #33 on: July 18, 2010, 02:08:34 AM »

I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with.

I pity the future wives of every male who says this...
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libertylover

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #34 on: July 18, 2010, 03:55:59 AM »

I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with.

I pity the future wives of every male who says this...

Totally agree.  Spot on.  It is usually what cheats say.
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libertylover

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #35 on: July 18, 2010, 04:13:26 AM »

Really if you are limiting yourself then that is your choice.  You have deemed it important to follow this process for finding a significant other.  The only way left open to expand your chances within this limiting structure is to move to another city and join a synagogue there.  Miami, Silver Spring Maryland, Southern NV, and LA all have substantial Jewish populations.   It might also bring in some new blood.  This is if you wish to stay in the USA.
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Amazing Richard

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #36 on: July 18, 2010, 10:53:02 AM »

Do you have to go through the matchmaker? What if you do online dating or go to an adult website to get laid and end up falling in love with someone who is not Jewish? Is that even an option? There has to be online dating sites for Jews, there is for Muslims. What about JDate, I'm not Jewish and have even heard of that site.

I met my first ball and chain via a hiking club, activities are a good way of meeting others, you'll already have something in common you both like. Another good way to meet potential mates (assuming they don't have to be Jewish and your not a total introvert), is through travelling,

I've also found that when my friends and I have lived with partners before marriage that those marriages have lasted and are still intact - compared with the fanatics who only feel you can be together after your vows - they all happen to be divorced, I've been there and done that, not good, oh, we're married now, okay, let's move in together, nope, not a good idea, go figure.

 As for your friends at 25 all being married and having kids, they are not the norm, not in this day and age, you should not feel like it will not happen for you, don't put that kind of pressure on yourself. I mean, I was 30 before my first one, then 35 for my second. If I think of my 6 closet friends 4 of them are over 40 and single, only 1 of those has been married. As for kids, adopt, there are so many kids who got the shit end of the stick it ain't funny, and that's just in North America. Go over to India and see all the street kids, yes there is God awful mountains of paperwork but it's worth it.

One thing that really fucking pisses me off are people who think that you are less than them because you are not married, don't have a house, don't have kids. Ever see the movie "Happiness?" The stupid bitch who has the perfect life, well, that perfect life ain't so perfect, her husband is a child toucher, her boy jerks off all the time and at the end of the movie she kisses her dog which happens to have just licked up her boys spunk, yea, life's a fucking show and trying to be a star always puts you in the shit. You ever stop and think that maybe others put pressure on you because they want you to have the same level of misery they have? If you want to be married and have kids it will happen, just don't let it dominate your life otherwise you'll end up in a situation you don't want to be in. That happened to me at 30, a sort of, "oh fuck," if I don't do it now I will end up 80 and alone, rubbish, I rushed into something when I should have said no and it was nothing but a giant clusterfuck. Don't judge your life by what you see in others lives, they are not you and you are not them, so stop comparing, that's very hard and unfair on yourself. You're 25, you should be out there shagging everything in sight.


I basically do have to go through a matchmaker. Every girl on my level of observance goes through one. Dating outside of that is for hooking up, and I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with. Well, flings aren't allowed, as is living with the opposite gender before marriage.

People don't put me down, but I keep getting prospects read to me. You're right that I shouldn't judge myself as compared to others tho. Very right indeed.

If all yer religious friends are properly conforming to yer "level of observance" and are all married and all that, but you are not, then you have a problem. You mentioned how these observant girls are giving you their "resumes".....have you gone on any dates with these kosher gals? Are you rejecting them based on what their resume states, prior to even meeting them? ...cuz that's what it sounds like.

Are you paranoid that the girl and her family will reject you when they find out that yer parents don't practice the religion? Are you shy around chicks?

Do not listen to the secular advice, if it is yer thing to conform to this hardcore religion. If the religion says you should already be married, then you should already be married. Therefore, if you are not married yet, then...you have a problem.
« Last Edit: July 18, 2010, 10:58:07 AM by Princess Pubella »
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Diogenes The Cynic

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #37 on: July 21, 2010, 03:48:15 PM »

So, on shabbat, the family I was having dinner with asked me if I own any non-white shirts. Well no, I only wear black and white. The penguin outfit. They said if I was willing to wear non-white shirts, there was this girl (they showed me her profile) to whom they could forward my profile. Lets see how this works out.
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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #38 on: July 21, 2010, 04:04:18 PM »

lol. It all rests on your clothing choice then? Wtf.
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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #39 on: July 21, 2010, 04:05:59 PM »

lol. It all rests on your clothing choice then? Wtf.
Isn't that how it always works?
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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #40 on: July 21, 2010, 04:09:01 PM »

Why do you only wear white shirts?
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Bill Brasky

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #41 on: July 21, 2010, 04:34:57 PM »

I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with.

I pity the future wives of every male who says this...

I pity the guy.  It sounds like he wants to marry a prim, joyless bitch, who will reluctantly agree to procreate in the missionary position once a year with the lights off. 
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Diogenes The Cynic

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #42 on: July 21, 2010, 04:44:27 PM »

Why do you only wear white shirts?

Ill agree with anarchair that its a WTF moment for me.

Basically, its a cultural thing out here in Monsey for Yeshivish men to wear white dress shirts, and black suits. I am not Yeshivish, but I dress that way, and the cultural connotation that a white dress shirt is something this girl doesn't care for. She also wants a TV in the home, and thats not something I would want. So, she seems to be more on the left than I am, but she was described as sweet and attractive, so, if she doesnt reject my profile, its on.
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I am looking for an honest man. -Diogenes The Cynic

Dude, I thought you were a spambot for like a week. You posted like a spambot. You failed the Turing test.

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #43 on: July 21, 2010, 04:47:37 PM »

I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with.

I pity the future wives of every male who says this...

I pity the guy.  It sounds like he wants to marry a prim, joyless bitch, who will reluctantly agree to procreate in the missionary position once a year with the lights off. 

I don't pity people who get what they want.   If a woman starts out a prim joyless bitch and the guy says "That's the one for me!" then he can live with what he chose.  If she starts out vivacious, fun, and sex-loving but turns into a prim joyless bitch, then I'll have sympathy for him.  But mainly, what "I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with" says is "I don't think vivacious, fun, and sex-loving women are good enough to marry, so I'll marry the prim joyless one and eventually cheat on her with the fun one because I feel unfulfilled with the marble statue I chose. "

Otherwise known as the Madonna/Whore complex, because some people are unable to wrap their minds around "good" and "good in bed" being the same person.  I say "person" because women get that too sometimes, though men seem to more often.  

Plus, Diogenes, it takes two people to have a fling.  If a fling makes her a whore, it makes you one as well.  
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Bill Brasky

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Re: Emotive Rant
« Reply #44 on: July 21, 2010, 10:42:24 PM »

I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with.

I pity the future wives of every male who says this...

I pity the guy.  It sounds like he wants to marry a prim, joyless bitch, who will reluctantly agree to procreate in the missionary position once a year with the lights off. 

I don't pity people who get what they want.   If a woman starts out a prim joyless bitch and the guy says "That's the one for me!" then he can live with what he chose.  If she starts out vivacious, fun, and sex-loving but turns into a prim joyless bitch, then I'll have sympathy for him.  But mainly, what "I wouldn't marry the type of girl I would have a fling with" says is "I don't think vivacious, fun, and sex-loving women are good enough to marry, so I'll marry the prim joyless one and eventually cheat on her with the fun one because I feel unfulfilled with the marble statue I chose. "

Otherwise known as the Madonna/Whore complex, because some people are unable to wrap their minds around "good" and "good in bed" being the same person.  I say "person" because women get that too sometimes, though men seem to more often.  

Plus, Diogenes, it takes two people to have a fling.  If a fling makes her a whore, it makes you one as well.  

I say "I pity the guy" because if thats what he wants, I can't imagine where he's coming from. 

But then again, he and I exist in alternate universes.  So everything from his desires to his beliefs is a complete mystery to me. 
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